Walking off a train in the pouring rain with a final project and nothing to cover it with,
holding a bag of wooden stretcher bars 3ft. and 2ft., a laptop, and various other items,
and walking about a mile back to the apartment.
Did I mention it's raining?
Okay, well, my final project for Drawing class is ruined, but at least I can stretch this canvas and get that over with and feel better about my life.
Stretcher bars won't fit together-
find something to use as a hammer...glass jar full of rubber cement glue
Noticing broken glass glued to my hand and the ground, with a nice mound of glue on the ground, when trying to get it off my hand, the glass cuts my skin and my hands starts bleeding.
Apartment-mate announces she is moving out. Proceed to sneak into her room with the intent of examining future single bedroom when I find a letter to whomever deals with these things explaining why the request to change rooms. Letter explains that I, and Gemma, are creating an environment impossible to work in, never go to class, never do homework, and basically are filthy bums that treat her like a mother and don't deserve to be here. Cry.
Realize the letter makes her sound stupider and psycho more than it makes me sound like any less of a person, but decide to call my mom anyway. Cry again because that's what moms are there for.
Eat some s'mores and feel a whole lot better. Make the nicest fucken home made canvas you've ever seen. work, work, work, work, work, work, work.
Dream Last Night (just because it interested me)
There was a long introduction, but I don't have to go into that because it was mostly feelings being visualized so it wouldn't make much sense to anyone that's not me.
As a foreward: College life is just summers between high school so I still go to LVPA, I'm just not there right now.
So the family is in the living room with the principal from LVPA, a very plump man, talking so casually to us about his very strong opinions a number of things and finally yells out something to the effect of "women have smaller brains than men". At that my brother, Bryce, gets so angry at him because he's my principal and that means he's not going to give me, being a woman, a fair education. So Bryce stands up and says fuck you strongly to him as he flicks him off. The principal gets so upset and offended that he says something about forget me ever going to LVPA again, it's back to Parkland for me. The very thought of stepping foot into Parkland ever again frightens me so much I start crying uncontrollably and am paralyzed. I have no idea what to do, all I know is that my life is going to take a very, very different turn when the time comes that I have to go back to Parkland.
After that, though we all go to the zoo. We pass a few animals, but then we get to a cage filled with miniature pandas! Seriously they're so tiny they could probably fit in your hand and there are tons and tons of them in each cage (there's two cages). The excitement over these animals makes me so happy I hug Bryce, but then am so happy I can't even control myself and forget about how angry I am and give the principal a hug. He just happens to be standing there, haha. Anyway, hugging him just makes me feel so much better because he's such a big guy, and I feel like a little kid, and I feel so happy.
Then I started to have real thoughts and woke up.